I have an archway in my home which I decorate with Christmas cards each December. We string a ribbon across the arch, pinned up in the middle, and hand the cards on the string as they arrive. So far there are 18 cards dangling above me as I walk by, and a small stack of photos and letters on the shelf to the right.
They are beautiful and cheering as a decoration but they mean so much more than that.
For some of these cards are the only time I am in contact with family members.
It's odd. Many of us probably have people we only contact once a year. I barely know some of this family anymore. My parents still go to visit these relatives in the summer but I've not seen them since I was a teenager. My memories of them are vague, but I know that they are family. Each year a card comes filled with a long letter detailing their year. I read it and feel connected. I send them a similar card and we are all fine with our annual tradition.
It seems strange, as I write it, to have family one knows only through an annual card exchange. My "real" family is much smaller--those I actually communicate with on a regular basis. There are my parents and one grandma, with an occasional communication with an aunt. Only my parents are local and we see each other at least once a month (or more) and speak several times a week by phone. We'll be spending Christmas eve and day together.
We're a small family, with an extended family out of state (the ones I get the cards from, mostly). I look forward to the annual card exchange. It makes me feel in touch with my family and friends. As the ribbon fills up, it is a colorful reminder of the people connected to me.
Connections are important, but I think over the next year I need to work on making it be more than just a Christmas card which connects me to my family.
Showing posts with label holidays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label holidays. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Handmade Gifts
This week I am finishing up a number of small handmade gifts. Since we are unemployed and our families have basically insisted that they don't want us buying them ANY gifts this year, I didn't want to be without gifts this Christmas season and have made a few things.
This year I am doing cookies and ornaments. I just finished sewing my second ornament for my parents.
It is kind of fun and reminds me of previous years where I used to learn a new craft every year in order to make a good gift.
I have learned how to mosaic tile, make glass paperweights, make "shrinky-dink" ornaments, paint custom welcome mats, paint glass candle holders, illustrated cookbooks, and crochet. I've been considering stained glass work, someday. This year it is felt animals for the tree.
I had given up doing crafts a few years ago because the time pressure of my dissertation combined with running out of crafts to try made it seem too hard.
This year I am photoshopping some photos, baking cookies, sewing some ornaments, and transfering some family cassette tapes to cd (audio letters from the 70s, recently rediscovered in a cupboard).
It is always hard to figure out what to do for gifts, especially with spending little to no money (I have maybe $6 in felt invested so far). It also take a lot of time. But it does show you were thinking about the person, and I guess that is what counts.
This year I am doing cookies and ornaments. I just finished sewing my second ornament for my parents.
It is kind of fun and reminds me of previous years where I used to learn a new craft every year in order to make a good gift.
I have learned how to mosaic tile, make glass paperweights, make "shrinky-dink" ornaments, paint custom welcome mats, paint glass candle holders, illustrated cookbooks, and crochet. I've been considering stained glass work, someday. This year it is felt animals for the tree.
I had given up doing crafts a few years ago because the time pressure of my dissertation combined with running out of crafts to try made it seem too hard.
This year I am photoshopping some photos, baking cookies, sewing some ornaments, and transfering some family cassette tapes to cd (audio letters from the 70s, recently rediscovered in a cupboard).
It is always hard to figure out what to do for gifts, especially with spending little to no money (I have maybe $6 in felt invested so far). It also take a lot of time. But it does show you were thinking about the person, and I guess that is what counts.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Holiday Baking and Adult Responsibilities
Is there anything more delicious than holiday goodies? This time of year, it is so nice to be have a hot eggnog or hot buttered rum, some christmas cookies, and wrap some presents.
I think the best part about these treats is that, in addition to their great taste, they are also a tradition--something I yearn for every year. I'm a big person for traditions. I love the repetition, each year, of certain actions or objects--the first ornament on the tree, the coolies, the carols. Perhaps because we moved so often when I was a child and I never felt like I had a solid home or roots, I always yearn for solid childhood traditions.
Of course, as an adult, I find that these traditions come with a price--not just the cost of groceries but of time--the hours it can take to make all the goodies. When I was little, I was not aware of all the work but as the years pass, I find out the work can be time consuming.
It's one of the interesting things about becoming an adult. As a child, you can't wait to grow up and do whatever you want. As an adult, you realized that you have so many more responsibilities along with that long awaited freedom.
So with holiday baking, I find that being an adult is more work, but I also find that I can still get the enjoyment out of a holiday tradition.
I think the best part about these treats is that, in addition to their great taste, they are also a tradition--something I yearn for every year. I'm a big person for traditions. I love the repetition, each year, of certain actions or objects--the first ornament on the tree, the coolies, the carols. Perhaps because we moved so often when I was a child and I never felt like I had a solid home or roots, I always yearn for solid childhood traditions.
Of course, as an adult, I find that these traditions come with a price--not just the cost of groceries but of time--the hours it can take to make all the goodies. When I was little, I was not aware of all the work but as the years pass, I find out the work can be time consuming.
It's one of the interesting things about becoming an adult. As a child, you can't wait to grow up and do whatever you want. As an adult, you realized that you have so many more responsibilities along with that long awaited freedom.
So with holiday baking, I find that being an adult is more work, but I also find that I can still get the enjoyment out of a holiday tradition.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Christmas "Brag" Letter: Why I Like It
Every year my family prepares a one-sheet letter which is sent to their Christmas card list along with a greeting card. It has long been a tradition. When I established my own home, I started my own letter to tell people what had been up in my life. I like these letters. They are a good way for me to have a record of what has been going on in my life over the years and to keep distant family apprised of my doings.
Every year I hear complaints about such letters in the media. There are comic strips that complain about how they are phony and filled with false bragging. People complain that they are pretentious or boring. I don't see it that way at all.
This year I've already received 4 of these letters from friends, some I see fairly often, some I correspond with by email a few times a year. Either way, it is nice to get caught up on what they are doing. I see nothing wrong with annual updates to make sure people know what is happening. I think most people appreciate it.
As long as it is truthful, I don't see the harm. If you get one of these letters, you don't have to read it, after all. Although if you don't care enough about these people to make sure you know what they have been up to, why are you exchanging Christmas cards?
My letter this year will, as always, be truthful. We are unemployed. We volunteer. We ran a big event. Our cat has a terminal illness. We are keeping busy with projects and have done some fun stuff. The good, bad, and ugly will be there for people to see. My friends and family can read it or not, but I like writing these letters and I like receiving other people's letters, so I'm not going to apologize for the much maligned Christmas letter. It serves a purpose and I'm keeping it.
Every year I hear complaints about such letters in the media. There are comic strips that complain about how they are phony and filled with false bragging. People complain that they are pretentious or boring. I don't see it that way at all.
This year I've already received 4 of these letters from friends, some I see fairly often, some I correspond with by email a few times a year. Either way, it is nice to get caught up on what they are doing. I see nothing wrong with annual updates to make sure people know what is happening. I think most people appreciate it.
As long as it is truthful, I don't see the harm. If you get one of these letters, you don't have to read it, after all. Although if you don't care enough about these people to make sure you know what they have been up to, why are you exchanging Christmas cards?
My letter this year will, as always, be truthful. We are unemployed. We volunteer. We ran a big event. Our cat has a terminal illness. We are keeping busy with projects and have done some fun stuff. The good, bad, and ugly will be there for people to see. My friends and family can read it or not, but I like writing these letters and I like receiving other people's letters, so I'm not going to apologize for the much maligned Christmas letter. It serves a purpose and I'm keeping it.
Monday, December 6, 2010
Christmas Lights: One of My Favorite Things
I generally don't like to drive at night but in December that changes. There is nothing better than driving in residential areas at night at seeing the houses decorated with lights. Sometimes you even seen a tree aglow with lights in the window.
There is something about that bright, festive tradition that always pleases me. Even the poorly done attempts at holiday decorations are a bit heartwarming. Of course, some people go all out and end up with beautiful creations (or sometimes monstrously tacky but overwhelming decor).
The video that went around a few years ago with the synchronized house lights or the homes we've all seen with the yard full of moving dolls--a bit excessive perhaps but for a month out of the year, it seems like it is kind of sweet and exciting.
Our lights are up once again. We are one of about 5 houses in our neighborhood that always put light sup (and take them down in January, thank goodness). We don't do anything spectacular but we have the normal line of lights (2 lines of lights actually, one at the gutter in white and one colored below it) at the roof, lights around the porch and entrance, lights at the big front window and one bush in the front with a lightbulb net. It's pretty but nothing like some people will do.
We'll be doing the small tree today. We don't have room for a large tree like my family does every year but I still want to see my ornaments--most of them are from my husband's and my childhoods--and then new ones we got on trips together since we were married. Every ornament has a story, I guess, and so each one is precious to me.
But what I really love is the twinkle of the lights.
Of course, the fact that we always have to clean house before decorating is good too. The house is looking so much better than it did last week. It's amazing what seem cleaning and some holiday decorating can do for the spirit. I feel positively cheerful, almost as twinkly as the lights that I love.
There is something about that bright, festive tradition that always pleases me. Even the poorly done attempts at holiday decorations are a bit heartwarming. Of course, some people go all out and end up with beautiful creations (or sometimes monstrously tacky but overwhelming decor).
The video that went around a few years ago with the synchronized house lights or the homes we've all seen with the yard full of moving dolls--a bit excessive perhaps but for a month out of the year, it seems like it is kind of sweet and exciting.
Our lights are up once again. We are one of about 5 houses in our neighborhood that always put light sup (and take them down in January, thank goodness). We don't do anything spectacular but we have the normal line of lights (2 lines of lights actually, one at the gutter in white and one colored below it) at the roof, lights around the porch and entrance, lights at the big front window and one bush in the front with a lightbulb net. It's pretty but nothing like some people will do.
We'll be doing the small tree today. We don't have room for a large tree like my family does every year but I still want to see my ornaments--most of them are from my husband's and my childhoods--and then new ones we got on trips together since we were married. Every ornament has a story, I guess, and so each one is precious to me.
But what I really love is the twinkle of the lights.
Of course, the fact that we always have to clean house before decorating is good too. The house is looking so much better than it did last week. It's amazing what seem cleaning and some holiday decorating can do for the spirit. I feel positively cheerful, almost as twinkly as the lights that I love.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Cutting Back on Christmas
My husband and I are unemployed. We're part of the long-term unemployed who are on federal extension of our benefits and now face losing them (my husband as soon as two weeks from now) because Congress is not voting to continue the extensions (and who knows when or if they will).
It's not that we want to be unemployed nor was it our fault that we lost our jobs. The economy is tough and people aren't hiring at the rate they usually are. I'm overqualified for too many jobs (so people tell me) and underqualified for ones I really want (apparently, since I don't get interviews for those).
As you can imagine, I've done no Christmas shopping this year. So far I haven't put the decorations up either. It's hard to feel Christmas-y when people all around you, including yourself, are struggling financially. I know three families with kids who are having trouble affording gifts for the kids. My parents have forbidden me to buy any gifts for the family and they've cut back on buying too because they want to be able to help us financially, if needed (something I've been avoiding all year but may have to fall back on to avoid losing our house).
It's a sad end of a difficult year. We're going to muddle through this month the best we can and keep looking for work but people don't tend to hire around the holidays so who knows how long that will take. I was looking for work even when I had my last job because I wasn't crazy about it and was hoping to find better. Instead I lost the job I hated and continue to look for work with no success. It's disheartening.
In discussions about the unemployment benefit extensions I see a bunch of employed people complaining about the lazy bums who should just go get a job. Really? Don't you think I would? How do you think I got the last job I had (which I hated)? I applied for it and accepted it because I needed the money. I was lucky to get it; it paid well and had benefits. I considered that enough, despite the work I was doing. True, I kept looking (secretly) but I'd do it again in a heartbeat to be bringing in that paycheck again.
We're not lazy. In fact, I still work all day (for free) and hardly rest at all. I'm as busy now as I was when I worked. I apply for jobs, I'm designing an online portfolio of my work, I do volunteer work, and I am working on some projects which I hope might make some money. I'm anything but lazy.
What I am, right now, is depressed. December is one of my favorite months of the year (because I love traditions, not because I'm religious) and this year the whole thing seems forced. We'll pretend things are normal but we're a month away from not being able to cover our bills, thanks to losing unemployment insurance benefits and so we have to cut back on everything (even more than I've been doing already)--and that means a Christmas without presents, feasts, entertaining, or events. Those all take money and money is something we simply don't have.
Santa--can you bring me a job? I've been a good girl.
It's not that we want to be unemployed nor was it our fault that we lost our jobs. The economy is tough and people aren't hiring at the rate they usually are. I'm overqualified for too many jobs (so people tell me) and underqualified for ones I really want (apparently, since I don't get interviews for those).
As you can imagine, I've done no Christmas shopping this year. So far I haven't put the decorations up either. It's hard to feel Christmas-y when people all around you, including yourself, are struggling financially. I know three families with kids who are having trouble affording gifts for the kids. My parents have forbidden me to buy any gifts for the family and they've cut back on buying too because they want to be able to help us financially, if needed (something I've been avoiding all year but may have to fall back on to avoid losing our house).
It's a sad end of a difficult year. We're going to muddle through this month the best we can and keep looking for work but people don't tend to hire around the holidays so who knows how long that will take. I was looking for work even when I had my last job because I wasn't crazy about it and was hoping to find better. Instead I lost the job I hated and continue to look for work with no success. It's disheartening.
In discussions about the unemployment benefit extensions I see a bunch of employed people complaining about the lazy bums who should just go get a job. Really? Don't you think I would? How do you think I got the last job I had (which I hated)? I applied for it and accepted it because I needed the money. I was lucky to get it; it paid well and had benefits. I considered that enough, despite the work I was doing. True, I kept looking (secretly) but I'd do it again in a heartbeat to be bringing in that paycheck again.
We're not lazy. In fact, I still work all day (for free) and hardly rest at all. I'm as busy now as I was when I worked. I apply for jobs, I'm designing an online portfolio of my work, I do volunteer work, and I am working on some projects which I hope might make some money. I'm anything but lazy.
What I am, right now, is depressed. December is one of my favorite months of the year (because I love traditions, not because I'm religious) and this year the whole thing seems forced. We'll pretend things are normal but we're a month away from not being able to cover our bills, thanks to losing unemployment insurance benefits and so we have to cut back on everything (even more than I've been doing already)--and that means a Christmas without presents, feasts, entertaining, or events. Those all take money and money is something we simply don't have.
Santa--can you bring me a job? I've been a good girl.
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